St Valentine's Day gift.

"THE final step in axing tolls on the Forth Road Bridge has been taken in the Scottish Parliament. MSPs backed overwhelmingly the scrapping of charges on the Forth and Tay crossings on Thursday and the bridges will be toll-free from 14th February. Transport Minister Stewart Stevenson said, “This is a great day for the people of Fife, Tayside and the Lothians."

With love to Fife, but Carnegie says the timing of the removal of tolls was a bit too tacky.

Carnegie's in the House.

Carnegie reads that "HRH The Princess Royal is to perform the official opening in Dunfermline on Wednesday 13th February, of the iconic new £2.9 million headquarters of the four British-based Carnegie charitable trusts. The Carnegie UK Trust, the Carnegie Dunfermline & Hero Fund Trusts and the Carnegie Trust for the Universities of Scotland this week began co-locating in their bespoke new building on the northern rim of Pittencrieff Park. Andrew Carnegie House – named after the trusts’ founder and the father of modern philanthropy – will be home to both a cutting-edge community-based trust and sister trusts engaged in higher education, research and policy advocacy, as well as support for injured heroes or their surviving dependents."

Carnegie thinks this is great but he wonders if he will get an invitation to the event? It would be good to meet The Princess Royal. Carnegie has read so much about her. Although Carnegie seems to recall that in his earlier incarnations he was wasn't exactly a big fan of the British Monarchy, which makes the decision of the Carnegie Trust to invite a Royal to open a building in his name somewhat ironic.

Police help me.

Carnegie reads: "POLICE have apologised for the way they handled an incident in Dunfermline which resulted in a pensioner being charged with assault for defending his own home. Peter Welsh (67), of Lilac Grove, was arrested and charged after two boys, aged 12 and 14, made complaints against him. The previous evening he and his wife Betty had been besieged in their house by around 20 teenagers. Chief Inspector Bob Baker admitted officers had not conducted themselves appropriately. And he told The Courier the matter would be thoroughly investigated."

An example of the police yet again treating the victim, who was trying to protect themselves and their property, as if they were the criminal. At least they had the good grace to admit they made a mistake, but it sends out the wrong signal to the real law breakers involved.

Murder.

Carnegie thinks there is a serious danger of reading too much into some statistisc.

"FIFE’S homicide rate has risen to its highest level in a decade, according to statistics published by the Scottish Government yesterday. Figures revealed five people were unlawfully killed in the region in the year ending April 2007—in the same period between 2005 and 2006 two murders were recorded."

It may be the highest for a decade but the total was thankfully only five. Five too many but a fraction of those recorded in other areas most notably Strathclyde where the rate is swelled by a prevalent knife culture. And given such a low number of offences recorded even one murder will result in a big percentage change in the figures.

It is other forms of crime that are the most likely for the average Fifer to come into contact with and that is what we should worry about.

Six weeks and counting.

Carnegie reads: "ON A day of history and high emotion, the Scottish Parliament yesterday passed the law to scrap the tolls on the Forth and Tay road bridges. MSPs voted by 122 votes to three, with one abstention, in favour of the Abolition of Bridge Tolls (Scotland) Bill, which will now go forward for Royal Assent. Parliament also backed a Scottish Tory amendment that will prevent bridge authorities from introducing tolls under the guise of congestion charging in the future. The £1 charge on the Forth Bridge and the 80p charge on the Tay bridge could be lifted at the beginning of February."

It's amazing what a difference a couple of years can make since the last time the Scottish Parliament refused to abolish tolls on the same bridges, at the same time as it was abolishing them everywhere else.

New icon anyone?

So, it appears to be official.

"A new bridge will be built across the Forth in Scotland's biggest construction project for a generation, finance minister John Swinney told MSPs today. The crossing has an estimated cost of between £3.25 billion and £4.22 billionAnd Mr Swinney said the bridge – which could open in about nine years time – would become an iconic structure.A new crossing is required because cables on the existing Forth Road Bridge are corroded, and there is a possibility it may have to close to lorries by 2013 and to all traffic by 2019.Today Mr Swinney told the Scottish Parliament that action was required to be taken now.'Doing nothing is not an option,' he said."

At long last we have an apparent decision, albeit one that will take nine years to bring to fruition, but better late than never. Fife will not be cut off. But the new Bridge gives Scottish engineering an opportunity to showcase itself once again to the world. We should make the most of the opportunity.

Rules? What rules?

So, "ELECTION WATCHDOGS are to speak to the Scottish Liberal Democrats in Dunfermline West after it emerged that the party spent more than was allowed at the Holyrood elections. In May the Lib Dem candidate Jim Tolson won a spectacular victory, snatching the seat from Labour. The expenditure limit set by the Electoral Commission for the seat was £11,111.51p. However, the party actually spent £11,125. The Electoral Commission said that no further action would be taken, although they do plan to speak to MSP Mr Tolson in due course."

What? Another politician, this time from Fife, who seems incaoable of obeying the rules and the law as it applies to election campaigns?

It would never have happened in Carnegie's day. Mr Tolson is a law breaker ... and a law maker.

All publicity is good ....?

Carnegie reads that "FIFE Council chiefs spent more than £1.7 million on publicity and communications last year, according to figures released by a tax watchdog. The TaxPayers’ Alliance have claimed that the exact figure for 2006/7 was £1,721,000 – the fourth highest sum of all Scotland’s local authorities. The sum is a staggering increase of 91.9 per cent on 10 years ago, which came in at £897,000."

The defence from a Fife Councillor really isn't just good enough, "A local authority has a responsibility to people. So while we always want to strike the best value, we have to keep people informed of what the council is doing. After all, it is their council.”

But did anyone ask if we wanted them to spend nearly £2 million on fluff and spin? Does it feel like your Council?

That's a Fife cracker.

Strange but true ... and only from Fife.

"A ROSYTH man fighting in war-torn Afghanistan with the Scots Guards won’t be having a cracker of a Christmas despite his father’s efforts – because of regulations on the carriage of ‘explosives’. Former Scots Guard, Major Iain Dalzel-Job, from Rosyth, helped to send more than 650 Christmas crackers to lift the spirits of troops, including his son Malcolm, to the north of Helmand province in Afghanistan, and also near Basra, Iraq. But the President of the Scots Guards Association Club was hindered in his festive greetings when he discovered that Christmas cracker snaps are forbidden from being transported on RAF planes because regulations class cracker snaps as explosives."

On the cheap.

At long last, the big cheeses at the Forth Estuary Transport Authority (FETA) are trying to save some cash on the "toll plaza debacle" by using a contractor who is already on site to demolish the canopy over the Bridge's tolls.

"THE MOST visible sign of the fact that motorists have to pay to cross the Tay road bridge—the toll plaza where the money is collected—could be gone by March ... Cleveland Bridge (UK) Ltd, which is working on a £19 million contract to replace the bridge bearings, has submitted a quote of £263,000 for the demolition work and the installation of subsequent traffic management arrangements on the southbound carriageway."

About time too says Carnegie.

Going bust.

Carnegie suspects that the journalist writing this story was having a bit of a laugh ...

"THE under-fire boss of Dunfermline’s lap-dancing club has been told to “say sorry to God” as a holy alliance prepares to stage a protest. MP Willie Rennie has already told Private Eyes’ Tony Cochrane to “pack up and go home” and this week appealed for people not to go in the hope the business goes bust." "Bust" and lap dancing ... get it?

Good to see that journalists can still have a sense of humour.

The Lollipop Rebellion.

"WEST FIFE could face a shortage of school crossing patrol officers, who say they might leave because of dissatisfaction with Fife Council’s ‘single status’ agreement. Crossing patrol officers were sent a letter in June by the council informing them of changes to pay and terms of employment under the agreement, details of which were explained at a meeting in August ... However, patrol officers claim the details were “not explained very well” – and were dismayed to discover that they would not be paid retainer fees or for school holidays."

Carnegie would like an answer to a question: why are so many of Fife's crossing patrollers positioned at pedestrian crossings? Surely given that each of them costs local council taxpayers several thousand pounds a year, either they could be relocated to places where there are no push button crossings or we could just save the money and employ a few more teachers.

Just a thought.

Feeling stressed?

"A COUNCIL have come under fire after they cut their care budget for the elderly - and introduced free massage sessions for their workers. Fife Council staff are being offered the expensive pampering sessions in a bid to cut absenteeism. The council have also been criticised recently for splashing out public money on other staff freebies such as lunches at top hotels, manicures, head massages and tarot card readings."

Mmmmmmm.

Carnegie is beginning to understand why Fife Council's taxpayers get such a raw deal. Looking after the welfare of employees is great, but so is the Council running itself properly. The first is not more important than the second. What about the stress levels of Fife residents?

At leisure.

Carnegie reads that Fife Council has launched a public information campaign about the £17.2 million worth of improvements it is planning to make to the Leisure Centre named after him in Dunfermline. Carnegie welcomes the commitment, the fact he gym will be doubled in size, introducing a pool with a move able floor, and a new cafe and play area.

Less welcome is the proposal that the centre will shut next summer and remain closed for two years to do the work. Surely it could have been done more quickly, inconveniencing users less?

Carnegie didn't have the time for "leisure."

Resignation.

So Carnegie reads that former Dunfermline Labour Councillor Bob Young has resigned his membership of the Labour Party after "30-odd" years and after serving as a Councillor for Abbeyview for 21 years, only to lose his seat at May's Council Elections, because of "party-infighting."

Very ominous for the Labour Party's attempts to win back the Dunfermline seat at the next UK General Election.

Carnegie respects Mr Young's decision to resign, and respects even More the fact he tried to stay on as a Councillor in May's elections when so many of his colleagues of all parties opted instead to take payments of up to £20,000 not to stand again.

Enjoy your retirement Bob. Here's hoping its a long one.

It's official.

So, Lauder College is no more and Carnegie College is born.

'About time to' says Carnegie.

Goodbye George Lauder. (He was Carnegie's uncle don't you know.)

£5 million up. £1 million down.

"THEY were built at a cost of £5 million and caused months of traffic disruption to motorists. Now, little more than a year later, a further £1 million will be spent tearing the Forth Road Bridge's hi-tech toll booths down again. Yesterday, it was revealed the project will also bring drivers at least another four months of misery as roadworks and speed limits usher in the abolition of tolls next year."

£6 million of your cash and mine, spent by a bunch of politicians and bridge bureaucrats who couldn't see beyond the end of their noses far enough to recognise that it was a case of when tolls would be abolished on the bridge, not if.

What a waste of public money.

Oor Wullie lives here.

Carnegie reads that the Labour Party has selected Thomas Docherty "(32)" as its candidate in the Dunfermline and West Fife Westminster. He apparently "narrowly defeated" local Labour Councillor Willie Sullivan in the selection contest, as well as many other "local" Labour candidates.

As well as being "local" (for two years) Mr Docherty manages to combine living in Dunfermline with working as a "PR man" for British Nuclear Fuels ... at Sellafield in Cumbria.

"Local" is a word Carnegie suspects residents of the city will be hearing a lot over the next couple of years until the next General Election, but is Mr Docherty really the best that Labour can do to try and win the Dunfermline parliamentary seat back from the Lib Dems and oust Willie Rennie MP?

If it is then they have already lost and Oor Wullie will be the victor at the next General Election. Carnegie thinks Labour has buried its head in Oor Wullie's bucket.

Magic Roundabout (2).

So, according to the local press the roadworks at Dunfermline's Sinclair Gardens roundabout have been extended for a further month meaning that they will completed two months behind schedule.

Carnegie has little to add to his previous comments, but he suspects that we haven't heard the end of this saga yet. Completion January 2008 anyone?

On top of the world.

So, Fife has another claime to fame.

"The scotch pie championships are hotly contested A Fife butcher has been named as the overall winner at the 2007 World Scotch Pie Championships. Amos Smith, of WF Stark butchers in Buckhaven, won at his first attempt in a competition which received a record number of entries. Mr Smith said the victory had made him feel "on top of the world."

Given the difficulties which Prime Minister Brown is having at the moment, Fife might just need another claim to fame soon.

Name that Bridge.

Carnegie reads that the battle between Fife, Falkirk and Clackmannanshire Councils to win the honour of naming the new Forth Crossing Bridge at Kincardine continues.

You would think that these three Councils would have better things to be doing with their time ... cracking down on anti-social tenants, improving council services, making sure our kids can read and write better ... but no, the focus is on naming a bridge.

Speaks volumes about the current priorities of local government. Maybe we should auction the rights to a commercial company a bit like they do with football stadiums these days and that way the Council Tax payer might get some benefit out of the process?

The McDonald's Bridge anyone?

"Fairly" confident.

Carnegie notes the comments this morning of Councillor Alex Rowley, Leader of the Labour Group on Fife Council and embattled Prime Minister Gordon Brown MP's Election Agent, in relation to his thoughts on whether the PM would overcome his current difficulties.

Councillor Rowley's less than ringing endorsement was summed by his comment that he was "fairly confident" the PM would prevail.

As the old saying goes ... with friends like Alex who needs enemies? Another Rowleyism ... and he works for the PM as well. A very fitting 100th post for the That's Fife Blog.

£158 million.

Carnegie reads that "FIFE IS facing a bill for more than £158 million in landfill taxes and penalties over a 10-year period unless new ways of treating waste generated by households and businesses are found. And that is despite record recycling rates, the council’s head of environmental services Fraser Thomson has told councillors."

The bill doesn't start falling due until 2010/11 so that gives our elected representatives on Fife Council a few years to get their finger out. Unfortunately, Carnegie isn't confident given their poor record on administration.

But Carnegie thinks a starting point might be to get to the bottom of the statement "Fife already produces more waste per household than the Scottish average and, with increasing population, the amount of rubbish produced is forecast to rise." But why?

That's logic.

Carnegie reads "FIFE COUNCIL has said it will not follow in the footsteps of Perth and Kinross Council by applying for legal city status for Dunfermline – because it is already a city. Despite the decision taken by its Perthshire counterpart to apply for city status at the next opportunity, which is thought to be in 2012, Fife Council insisted there was no need for Dunfermline to apply. A spokeswoman explained, “We already have city status. Dunfermline was created as a Royal Burgh in 1588.”

Carnegie agrees. If I was a city and already had that status I would be loathe to let Fife Council anywhere near the concept.

By the time they had finished, I probably wouldn't even be a humble hamlet.

Goodbye Mr Depute Provost.

So, "COMPLAINTS ABOUT the conduct of Fife’s former depute provost Alf Patey regarding the dedication ceremony of Glenrothes War Memorial were mainly “well-founded,” a top level inquiry has concluded. The local authority’s head of law and administration Harry Tait was asked to look into Mr Patey’s actions before and during the ceremony on November 7 after concerns were expressed at a council meeting. Mr Tait’s report, based on interviews with all concerned, was made public yesterday. Councillors have received a copy and it will be made available online and on request, said chief executive Ronnie Hinds. Councillor Patey, who resigned as depute provost on Tuesday but is continuing to represent Glenrothes West and Kinglassie, declined to comment on the findings."

Carnegie seems to recall that the reason for the move to using proportional representation for May's Council Elections was to raise the calibre of Councillors elected. That obviously worked then .... eh?

Planning enforcement.

So, "A NEW Guide on how Fife Council deals with people who fail to stick to planning regulations is being compiled, with the authority insisting it will act against anyone breaking the rules. Fife Council is in the process of putting together a Planning Enforcement Charter which will give customers advice and information on the subject."

Given Fife Council's appalling record on defending its planning refusals, they have obviously given up on trying to do that and will instead be pursuing Joe Public for minor breeches of planning laws. Anyone for a new conservatory while you still have a chance of getting one? It would be easier to get a new quarry.

Can't Pay. Won't Pay.

So, "UNPAID Poll Tax from the 1990s totalling £12 million has been written off by Fife Council after efforts to chase debtors failed. But finance chiefs insist they will still continue to push for payments owed from bills issued between 1989 and 1992 when the controversial tax was imposed under Conservative Party rule. The writing off process has been described as a 'technical, tidy-up exercise' by bosses who had budgeted for it, recognising no tax system yields a 100 per cent collection rate."

Given the financial difficulties of Fife Council it isn't good to be writing off £12 million unpaid debts, but then again the chances of getting much of the cash are virtually non-existent Carnegie thinks after the fifteen years that have elapsed.

No tax system has a 100% collection rate, but Fife Council seemed to miss that target by a mile.

Here we go again.

Carnegie reads "Motorists have been warned they face at least three months of delays on one of the country's most congested commuter routes. Parts of the Forth Road Bridge carriageway will close for weeks at a time to enable the work to be carried out, starting in April 2009. The major roadworks are needed to replace the roadway's main expansion joins, now reaching the end of their life after 43 years wear and tear."

Carnegie points out that over the last couple of years there have been lane closures on the Forth Road Bridge running to dozens of weekends to allow road surfacing works. Surely there must have been some way of doing the replacement of "expansion joints" at the same time given that the road surface was very largely exposed? And avoiding the next lot of major roadworks in 2009.

Carnegie is beginning to think that the guys at the Forth Estuary Transport Authority (FETA) are either severely incompetent or intent on causing as much disruption as is possible to the punters using the Bridge. He is really not sure which of these two scenarios is most likely.

Planning for failure ... again.

Carnegie reads that yet again Fife Council has lost yet another appeal against one of its planning refusals.

"A PLANNING application to redevelop St David’s Harbour in Dalgety Bay has been approved by the Scottish Government, despite opposition from residents and Fife Council. The decision by the government reporter to allow developers Eadie Cairns to begin work at the harbour brings a long-running saga to an end. Fife Council and the town’s community council had opposed the project because the developer planned to build a large number of flats. Residents were keen for the area to be used for leisure facilities, and in particular new bars and restaurants. But, after a two-day public inquiry in September, the reporter has decided to allow the project to go ahead."

Carnegie has said all of this before but what is the point of Fife Council taking planning decisions and then not being able to defend them when they are challenged? Carnegie reckons that the Council have lost at least three planning appeals in as many months and Mr Carnegie thinks that the Council needs to put his own house in order, otherwise it is local people and communtities that will pay the price for their failure, again ... and again ... and again.

For sale?

Carnegie reads that "ELECTRONICS manufacturer Cemtron’s bid to shut its three sites in Fife and move into the empty Lexmark factory could be scuppered by Fife Council. The firm wants to sell its Dalgety Bay site for housing and use the cash to buy the Rosyth plant, expand its business and bring in new jobs. But Cemtron’s current site, in Hillend Industrial Park, is zoned for employment use only and the fear is they will pull the plug on Scotland if they don’t get the green light."

Carnegie suspects the proposal is nothing short of economic blackmail: give us planning permission for a housing development or we will go elsewhere.

The view of Fife Council should be very simple. Consider the planning application as just that and nothing else. If it stands up and should be approved then approve it, but let's not give way to any developer or property owner trying to hold a gun to the Council's head, especially given the recent experience of Lexmark. It has after all been less than a year since Lexmark shut their former facility in Rosyth with the loss of 700 jobs. Perhaps we should be taking the promises of new jobs by any business with a big pinch of salt.

£1 a day.

Carnegie reads that Fife Council is to consider extending car parking charges in Inverkeithing and Dunfermline aimed at rail commuters at a minimum cost of £1 a day, three times that for other users.

Sounds very simple doesn't it. The problem is that it probably won't work, especially if people aren't used to paying any charges at the moment. It will lead to more people parking in residential streets, or indeed even perhaps trying to park their cars at other stations not covered by the parking charges, e.g. in Dalgety Bay or Aberdour.

The fundamental problem is that there isn't enough car parking provision near the the stations that are becoming increasingly busy. Fife Council should be trying to sort that out. After all, you shouldn't encourage people to use public transport and not put in place the facilities to allow them to do it.

The real irony is that over ten million pounds has been spend on the 1040 parking space "park and ride" facility at Ferrytoll near Inverkeithing for bus services, which is regularly running 30% empty (you can see it from the train). Perhaps we should be encouraging people to take the bus?

Righting a palpable wrong.

So, "MSPS gave their overwhelming backing to plans to scrap the tolls on the Forth and Tay bridges—the Scottish Government’s first piece of legislation ... The basis of the Abolition of Bridge Tolls (Scotland) Bill was passed by 107 votes to four with two abstentions. Those who voted against were Green MSPs Robin Harper and Patrick Harvie, Lib Dem Hugh O’Donnell and Tory Margaret Mitchell. Lib Dem Edinburgh MSPs Mike Pringle and Margaret Smith abstained. A Tory spokesman said later that Ms Mitchell supported abolition and voted in error."

So the end is now in sight and Carnegie leaves the last word to MSP Ted Brocklebank: "We are righting a palpable wrong." It's just a pity it took so long. Longer than it had to if some of Fife's elected representatives had shown more commitment for putting the interests of their constituents ahead of those of their party.

Crime down?

Carnegie reads in this week's local press that Fife Constabulary are claiming that since April the amount of anti-social behaviour, vandalism and breach of the peace in the Kingdom has fallen by 10%.

Do you believe them?

Carnegie doesn't. Perhaps it's because people have given up complaining because of the lack of response from the cops, or because of the fact that much of the crime that falls into these categories is committed by young people below the age at which the cops and the courts have any ability to get really involved, with those caught being referred to the overwhelmed children's' reporters system.

Or maybe even because of the problems with using Fife Police's automated call handling system with the nice prerecorded music whilst you wait. Take your pick, but Carnegie doesn't believe Fife Police on this ... he wished he could.

Green machine.

Carnegie reads that recycling rates in Fife broke through the 40% barrier between April and September with more than 56,000 tonnes of waste recycled or composted. Amongst this were: 18.000 tonnes of garden waste, 12,000 tonnes of paper and 4,000 tonnes of glass, giving a recycling rate of 41.8% for the Kingdom.

But Carnegie would question how much more scope there is for Fifers to recycle in the areas where two weekly bin collections have been introduced without Fife Council making much more readily available facilities for recycling materials not bearing recycling logos like specialised packaging.

While they are at it they might also want to give some thought to helping those like the elderly or those suffering from poor health, who can't always get ready access to cars to transport their recycling to recycling points. Oh and how about a Council tax rebate for the poor council taxpayers who like Carnegie are probably spending scores of hours of their own time every year recycling materials that would previously have been collected and sorted by Fife Council itself?

Lauder-able change.

Carnegie also reads that the Scottish Government has given the go ahead for Lauder College to change its name to Carnegie College. Another good week for Carnegie then. Here's hoping it generates a few more visitors to his Birthplace Museum.

Visitors up.

Carnegie reads that the numbers of visitors to his Museum (the Andrew Carnegie Birthplace Museum in Dumfermline) has doubled "this season" to 7,000.

Carnegie hates to blow his own trumpet but he feels he must, given his international reputation and the number of Carnegie bequests that have been created around the world he would have expected a few more punters to make the pilgrimage to Dunfermline to to see where the great man himself was born and lived.

Carnegie also notes that the Carnegie Trust has allocated £250,000 to further develop the Museum. Mr Carnegie says about time too. He is no spring chicken but some aspects of the Museum are definitely showing their age, which probably explains why so few people are visiting it.

Pulling teeth.

Carnegie reads that "Almost 34,000 NHS patients have had their registration with a dental practice in Tayside or Fife withdrawn in the past three years, the Scottish Government has revealed. The figures come after it emerged last month that over half of all adults north of the border are not registered with a health service dentist. Public health minister Shona Robison said she is not ruling out changes to the length of time patients can go without a visit before they are effectively struck off lists."

Carnegie thinks that this figure is just the tip of the proverbial iceberg with many more Fifers not realising as yet that they don't any longer have an NHS dentist, or even the prospect of getting onto a private dental list, even if they were willing to pay the much higher costs for treatment.

Something really should be done about this whole situation. The sad thing is that it has been a problem for years and as yet no politician has bitten the bullet as regards solving it and it is the public that are losing out in increasing numbers.

Fife's Dream Factory.

Carnegie reads "A MICROCHIP plant which promised to create 2000 jobs in west Fife is facing demolition after lying empty for 10 years. The former Hyundai plant near Dunfermline, which was bought by Motorola in 2000, is the region’s latest victim of outsourcing. An industry expert said the £2.4 billion white elephant had failed to produce a single micro-chip because of the lure of cheap labour in the Far East. It is unlikely anyone will find a use for the building because of its purpose-built interior."

Carnegie thinks that demolishing a building which cost so much to build would be nothing short of a financial scandal, but even he recognises that when a building is not "fit for the purpose" for which it was designed then what is the point in leaving it in place, like the blot on the landscape that this white elephant is fast becoming?

Whatever happens, with so much cash involved (even on a balance sheet somewhere), don't expect anything to happen fast to Fife's Dream Factory.

Forth View.

Carnegie reads that "FORTH ROAD BRIDGE bosses are set to spend £250,000 demolishing the canopy over the toll plaza after residents complained it ruined their view. The £5 million toll booths have only been in place for just over a year but will be removed following the decision to scrap tolls by the government."

This expensive saga just gets worses and worse, and worse ... what a waste of public money.

Hands free.

Fresh from disclosures last week that the UK Government's Immigration Minister Liam Byrne MP plead guilt to using his mobile phone whilst driving, Carnegie notes that Fife Conservative Regional MSP Ted Brocklebank is apparently also due to appear in court on charges related to doing exactly the same thing.

"MID-SCOTLAND and Fife MSP Ted Brocklebank is facing court proceedings over alleged use of a mobile telephone while driving ... the MSP, who lives in St Andrews, has been charged by police following an alleged incident in north-east Fife. The case has been called on the roll at Cupar District Court and Mr Brocklebank tendered a not guilty plea by letter to a charge alleging that he committed the offence on May 7 this year at Guardbridge. The trial will not take place until next year."

Carnegie is reminded that Mr Brocklebank spent a lot of time during the Scottish Parliament's last session pursuing the health risks around the location of mobile phone masts so it is ironic that he will find himself in court having to defend his own apparent driving related mobiole phone useage. It's clearly not just the masts that are the only dangerous thing associated with mobile phones.

Lapping it up.

So, Carnegie reads that the Councillors serving on the Fife Licensing Board have managed to give the go ahead to a lap dancing club in Dunfermline without realising they had done it, and are now seeking to blame officials of the Board for the proverbial "cock-up."

"COUNCILLORS have been left red-faced after it emerged they gave the go-ahead for a lap-dancing club in Dunfermline, without knowing what they were doing. The licensing board last week granted a licence transfer to the new owners of the old Robins Cinema in East Port, which until last year housed nightclub Déjà vu. But when the application came up for approval the board was not made aware of the lap-dancing plans and members gave it the nod, along with a number of others, without discussion."

Carnegie thinks that their Justices are washing their hands too lightly of their mistake. They are after all the ones who actually take the decisions and they should be the ones satisfying themselves that everything is above board. The mistake is therefore their own and they should just admit as much, instead of blaming the officials that work for them and can't answer back.

Mr Director.

Speaking of MP's interests, well John MacDougall MP for Glenrothes can beat most, with his declaration that in his career he went from being a "boilermaker" to being a member of the Institute of Directors. A career change which probably helped contribute to one of his "leisure" interests, "vintage cars."

He has style and maybe even a bit of class.

Hooray and Ooohhhh.

Carnegie notes that this year's £4.7 million pound road resurfacing work on the Forth Road Bridge has been completed ... hoorah .... only to then have major delays hit commuters using the Fife Circle railway line .... ooohhhhh.

"Thousands of rail passengers have faced a morning of delays and cancellations after a major signalling fault in Fife. Engineers have been working to try to fix the cabling problem, on a stretch of track between Markinch and Ladybank."

It seems to Carnegie that something isn't right somewhere. And while he is on the subject ... why is it that Dalgety Bay is served by a "rail halt" and not a railway station. As any Fifer using this station knows, often to their cost, the difference means that any train passing through DB doesn't have to stop if it is full, even if it supposed to. But surely in these days when DB boasts a population of over ten thousand it is time to correct this very strange transportation anachronism and give Dalgety Bay a fully paid up "railway station"?

Fife's cheap democracy.

Carnegie reads the list of expenses of Fife's elected Westminster MPs which was helpfully published in The Herald.

Topping the list of expenses claimed by a Fife MP was Lib Dem Willie Rennie, although he came in at a much more modest number 27 in the listing of all Scotland's 59 Westminster MPs, next was Sir Menzies Campbell at 37, then came Gordon Brown at 46, with John MacDougall bringing up the rear at number 54 in the Scotland rankings, albeit that he claimed one hundred and thirty thousand pounds.

Mr Carnegie is sure that these self effacing and modest claims, by Scottish standards, although amongst the most expensive in the UK, will be welcomed by Fife's voters.

Ferry white elephant?

Carnegie reads that the consortium bidding to get a Fife ferry link to Norway are "confident" that Rosyth will win out over other bidders to win the link, which would be largely aimed at freight transfers.

Mr Carnegie hates to put a damper on things, but he seems to recall that the current Rosyth to Zeebrugge route hasn't went down too well with the "trucker community" and freight operators, indeed the original Superfast ferry has been downgraded to a smaller ship (original pictured) and changes have been made to the original timetable for crossings.

If someone wants to run a ferry from Rosyth to Norway then that is a matter for them, but the Scottish public shouldn't be asked to pick up the tab for it if it isn't commercially viable on its own merits, especially when we are asking Fife pensioners to stump up more for what should be discounted bus trips to Perth and Dundee.

Right to buy.

Carnegie reads that Fife Council's SNP/Lib Dem administration is to consider building new Council houses in the Kingdom. "A DECISION on whether to build new council houses in Fife will be made early in the New Year."

Now Carnegie would agree that there needs to be more affordable social housing available for those who can't or don't want to buy, but he would point out that until curbs are put on the current rights of tenants to buy, that any Council thinking about the move would be as well to take the cash they will spend on new homes and bury it in a hole in some one's garden for all the social benefit it would deliver.

Several Scottish Councils have restricted the right to buy in their areas because there are so few Council houses left, and Fife has some areas included within that, but until the policy is changed nationally there will still be no incentive to build Council houses for rent. Carnegie thinks it would be far better to work with other types of social landlord to deliver additional homes for rent, and probably a lot cheaper in the medium term.

Taking the strain?

Carnegie reads that Fife's pensioners are to lose out under plans by Fife Council to try and solve some of its financial problems.

"FIFE pensioners will have to pay £4 for return journeys to Edinburgh, Perth and Dundee to help cash-strapped Fife Council save £550,800. Previously, holders of the National Entitlement Card were eligible to use trains for 50p per single journey but councillors at last Thursday's transportation committee decided to raise the price from April 2008, to help the department out of the red.Council officials wanted to scrap cheap rail travel completely to encourage more people to get the bus – but these plans were shelved after elected members rejected the idea."

Carnegie can't really see that the difference is between rail and bus travel: they are after all both forms of public transport. And he has even more difficulty understanding how individual Councils, like Fife's, can mess about with the detail of what is supposed to be a national travel scheme for elderly people. Yet again Fife's pensioners are losing out because of a decision by Fife Council.

Fife Council raises half a million pounds by the change; Fife's pensioners pay half a million pounds MORE for the same level of service.

Anti-social behaviour.

Carnegie reads that the normally quiet village of Aberdour has become the latest to be held hostage by gangs of mindless yobs, sometimes fifty at a time, who are turning up late in the evenings on Friday and Saturday nights at Silversands Beach and making a nuisance of themselves.

The result is that bus company Stagecoach is threatening to cancel the last bus services in and out of the town on Friday and Saturday nights because of the problems being caused.

Yet again it appears that ordinary folks are having their lives made a misery of by a small number of youngsters who are basically out of control. Mr Carnegie thinks it is time for the authorities to clamp down and to start making the lives of those are causing the problems uncomfortable for a change. Perhaps even hold the offending youngsters' parents accountable for their lack of parental responsibility?

Anyone for tennis?

Regarding the "interests" of Fife's elected representatives one that might have escaped the attention of Fife politicos is the fact that the PM of Fife Gordon Brown lists "tennis" as one of his.

Very proletarian. Very working class. Something else Gordon shares in common with former PM Tony Blair.

Members' interests.

Fresh on the heels of his disclosures about the "leisure interests" of Fife Members of the Scottish Parliament, Helen Eadie (travel - largely across the Forth Bridge and Bulgaria) and Marilyn Livingstone (yoga), Carnegie is happy to add a few more to the mix.

Regional MSP Murdo Fraser declares an "interest" in Rangers FC and "classic cars," whilst the SNP's Tricia Marwick only has time for "reading."

Conservative MSP Elizabteh Smith has an interest in cricket, whilst Liberal Democrat MSP for Dunfermline West Jim Tolson likes "motoring" (again presumably over the Forth Road Bridge.)

Carnegie never realised that they were such an interesting lot.